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truth! - i don't always come to a complete stop at a stop sign, but when i do, it's because the person behind me is driving like a douche bag.

The Most Interesting Man in the World Meme - I don't always come to a complete stop at a stop sign, but when I do, it's because the person behind me is driving like a douchebag.

Here's to hoping I drop you a lot less then my phone

so funny, when I was pregnant I was at a party and kept dropping everything, including my phone and a cute little 10 yr old told me this exactly. "I hope when you have the baby, you don't drop it like your phone" She was so concerned for the baby.

I like doing hootrat stuff with my friends

Funny pictures about Hoodrat stuff with my friends. Oh, and cool pics about Hoodrat stuff with my friends. Also, Hoodrat stuff with my friends.

Funny Confession Ecard: I really would like to take a yoga class. But I really can't trust my farts.

I went to ONE yoga class ever and some old lady farted really loud and I had to leave the class because I was laughing so hard I was crying, literally

@Alexandria Cutie... Thank you gorda!!! I love you to the moon and back...  The beginning of a beautiful friendship.

The beginning of a beautiful friendship. The beginning of a beautiful friendship. The beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Haha - "Sometimes I drink water to surprise my liver." #funny #alcohol #someecards

Funny Confession Ecard: Sometimes I drink water to surprise my liver.

i dont always talk on the phone but when i do... // that's because i hate the contraption. so i walk the frustration off.  except when i talk on the kitchen phone, which is not cordless.  then i'm like a wild animal, CHAINED AND CAGED AND OH GOD.

i dont always talk on the phone but when i do. // that's because i hate the contraption. so i walk the frustration off. except when i talk on the kitchen phone, which is not cordless. then i'm like a wild animal, CHAINED AND CAGED AND OH GOD.<<<Yep I do

hahah i just died

I'm sorry, this is a rake and shovel conversation. No hoes allowed *oh ahahaha*

Haha! :) yep.

When I'm drunk with my cell phone. You Get A Text! You Get A Text! You Get A Text! Everyone Gets A Text!

"Kiss my ass! You cheated on me in my dream last night and I'm not over it!"    This sounds like my husband, not me.

My husband said I woke up and slapped him one night and the next morning I told him I had a dream he cheated on me.

Slow down on the tequila

Life isn't a fairy tale. I you lose a shoe at midnight, you might wanna slow down on the tequila.

SURFSHACK_2_RECT540

A Surf Shack with a Modernist Soul

Funny Music Ecard: What if rappers rapped about nice things? Like, 'Girl I'm gonna take your clothes off. and hang them neatly in the closet, yeeaah.

Funny Reminders Ecard: Girl, this ain't no bakery. Put that muffin top away!@ http://www.someecards.com/usercards/viewcard/MjAxMi1kNDdjZWYxY2E0NGJlZWRl

Girl, this ain't no bakery. Put that muffin top away!//Lmao "This may be a bakery, but our case is fully stocked. Take your muffin top somewhere else!" How I feel at work

Haha!  www.LiquorList.com  "The Marketplace for Adults with Taste" @LiquorListcom   #LiquorList

Someone keeps putting vegetables. in the beer crisper! My husband has actually asked "Where am I supposed to put the beer? There's vegetables in the drawer.

Morning coffee (39 photos)

Morning coffee (39 photos)

i don't always eat mexican food but when I do i fill up on chips first- everytime