You're so hard on yourself. Take a moment. Sit back. Marvel at your life: at the grief that softened you, at the heartache that made you more wise, at the suffering that strengthened you. Despite everything, you still grow. Be proud of this
You are Not Everyones Cup of Tea. I was once told that for every 15 people, you meet, 1 will gel immediately, 2 will make good acquaintances, 10 will be pleasant but not friends, and 2 will simply not like you, full stop i.e. they are simply not your cup of tea!!