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Peace, love, understand, and CHOCOLATE!

All I want is peace, love, understanding, and a chocolate bar bigger than my head. Makes sense, we'll start working on one!

I can't take the stupid today.  #STFU

They need to use this version of miranda rights on certain episodes of Law and Order!

....pshh, every girls dream is to eat without getting fat

every guy thinks every girls' dream is to find the perfect guy. pshh, every girls' dream is to eat without getting fat: SO TRUE!

hahaha, guess I am sooooo tired all the time!

I call that "slaphappy." You get so tired, that you are to the point of being dazed and goofy and weird, all at the same time.

Sister, I will pick you up.

You and I are sisters quotes quote family quote family quotes sister quote sister quotes sibling quotes my sister

It only takes a second to show someone how you feel about them, the police call it indecent exposure, but whatever. View more funny quotes. Related posts: If you love someone… If You Want To Feel Rich… If You Love Someone… Quote of the Day – I’m not fat

Their toys is the only thing they know oh so well

Hell hath no fury like your kid catching you throwing away ANYTHING, EVER. I smuggle out broken crayons like a Mexican Drug Lord.

How to diffuse the situation when boyfriends/girlfriends get mad…

-If your boyfriend/girlfriend is mad at you, put a cape on them, and say "Now you're super mad!" If they laugh, marry them.