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then I walk away from the mirror and hope i didn't say that out loud

Profiling at its finest. I blame Criminal Minds. Have you ever looked at someone and thought. Yep you have a person locked in your basement.

Sleep ...

Or what the honey badger DOES care about, or what the fox actually says.

We've all done this, right? lol

Relatable Post: That fail moment when you attempt to pull your blanket up, and punch yourself in the face

Jokes humor funny

funny quote based on how i react when toast pops out, i will never look cool walking away from an explosion. so me

This just about sums it up… “I'm a perfectionist with a procrastinator complex. Some day I’m going to be awesome.

My family says I'm like this. *rolls eyes*

My family has been known to play board games until someone cries. :-P // If you're not prepared to lose every friend you have over a board game, you're not playing hard enough.

They led long, full lives. Now they know peace. After living with my feet though - they might deserve better.

Dryer lint: Cremated remains of missing socks. So true. More here: 20 Hilarious Funeral Humor Memes // Funny

Cuddling is when you hold your pet hostage and think they enjoy it.

Happiness is. Cuddling your pet. You just realized. Cuddling is when you hold your pet hostage and think enjoy it. haha yeah I can see that.

Haha

A Recent Study shows that women who carry a little extra weight.live longer than the men who mention it!

Sad honesty!

"When you are dead, you don't know that you're dead. It is difficult only for the others.It is the same when You are Stupid. You Know Who You Are!

Slamming A Phone Shut Was Awesome Stuff…

Today's kids will never know the feeling of slamming a phone shut after an argument, now all you can do is poke your screen in an angry rage.

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Beer before liquor, never sicker. Toothpaste before orange juice, dead. Haha thus the reason I rarely drink orange juice I about died!

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