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That awkward moment when you talk to yourself and you just start smiling like an idiot because you're just so hilarious.

A state trooper stopped a 95 year old woman on Interstate 75, and noticed as he was checking her drivers license, that she had a concealed carry permit. He said got any guns with you ma'am? She said yes, a 45 Smith & Wesson in the glove compartment, a 357 magnum in the console and a 38 special in my purse. The trooper said LADY what are you scared of. She said.... NOT A DAMN THING!

When one door closes and another one opens, it's time to pack up and move because your house is clearly haunted.