Explore Oreos, Hilarious, and more!

I need to do this, I talk to you EVERY single day even when I'm mad at you. But I need to knock it off

I concur :) Let him ask; text, call ~ if he can't do that; he'll have a hard time asking for things of value all your life.

One time I was so jealous all my friends got the new crayola markers with the black on the outside like in 2nd grade

Markers weren't out yet, but I do remember the aroma when I opened my new box of 48 Crayola crayons!


My brother told me aliens and monsters lived under the bed.then the next morning I stuck my led off and hit the dog's leg and thought it was a monster's leg.from then on i would crawl to the end of the bed and take a flying leap out of my room :D

Ha ha ha... Exs are exs for a reason

I was just thinking about eating the leftover Chinese I have. Oh you're dating my ex? Cool, I'm eating a sandwich want those leftovers too? Yep you can have all of them!

Note to husband

Note to husband - your dinner's in the recipe book page And, the ingredients are at the store. (Don't have to tell my husband, he loves cooking.

Exactly! This is why traveling with extroverts makes me anxious...especially when I'm not allowed to go to sleep when I need to & "its OK" (their words) :/

This is probably why I'd be a terrible girlfriend/wife. "OK, the conjugal visit's over.

What a quinkadink...

When you're stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate, and sweets. Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Sometimes I open my mouth and my mother comes out - Love of Life Quotes