Just because I never brought this up to you in person doesn't mean that I didn't notice the signs. I didn't want to jeopardize our friendship and look like an asshole just talking sh*t about your Mother. I needed to present this to you in a manner that wouldn't have you instinctively running to her defense.
If you do not really want a person or a relationship with them. Don't make their life miserable. And if you are miserable with your own life don't drag someone else into your life. Get through what you need to before you bring another into your life. This way you can have a better chance of having a healthier relationship.