Not pretend, but our friendship's over now (or maybe not, I don't know) and messaging him to tell him that I miss him is just inappropriate. I doubt it'll be fine for him to be my friend again. Knowing him.
We had two years together, and I take comfort in knowing we're still friends. We still talk, but I take even more comfort in the fact that you know you screwed up. You know you lost someone amazing. -- of course i can't help but wonder.