Phone: you're running out of space. Delete stuff. Phone: not those apps. I gifted them to you. I don't care that you never use them. Pick an app you downloaded and use instead.
"The only problem with being genuinely nice to everyone is that you end up feeling consantly disappointed that people don't treat you like you treat them."
"" I can't tell you the time because my watch is doing a software update" is probably the most ridiculous thing I've said all week "
"the internet has taught me more about feminism, gender, sexuality and mental illness than school and it shouldn't be like that"
""Elevator music" is a widely known concept, yet I've never been in an elevator that plays music "
my husband, who has been in a coma for 5 weeks, woke up. When I went to visit him, the first thing he did was try and continue the argument we had been having before he crashed the car
"I own a bakery. Once I had a customer tell me to give her bread for free because she knew the owner if I didn't she'd get me fired. "I responded, I am the owner and I've never met you in my life " "
So my grandma just asked me if her new laptop will get too heavy if she downloads too many files from the internet.
Whisper App. Confessions from people raising a child who isn't theirs.
Whisper App. Confessions on interactions between customers and waiters.