After the Wedding: 10 Things You Need to Know About Being a Stepmom---Good points. Completely agree with and Do not take away the "first" from a mother. Always ask BEFORE doing, and if the m(Step Quotes Good Advice)
Just because you aren't given the credit and haven't been recognised for your work doesn't mean you have to give up or stop. You don't always need credit, other people do not always have to know what you are capable of doing as long as you do.